


What Juno Doesn't Know Won't Kill Him

by mercutiglo



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Hospitals, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-09-06
Packaged: 2019-07-07 21:57:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15917058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercutiglo/pseuds/mercutiglo
Summary: Juno gets released from the hospital.





	What Juno Doesn't Know Won't Kill Him

What Juno doesn't know wont kill him. Or at least, it’s not guaranteed to kill him, there are a lot of things and people that he does know that would very much like to kill him, and many have certainly already tried. Sure, there are probably people and things that Juno doesn’t know that have also already tried to kill him, but it’s about the statistics, you know?

The point was that the hospital was cold and clean and scrutinizing of Juno’s every movement and every inch of his tired, aching body wanted to leap out of the bed and get as far away from the sounds of beeping life machines and the smells of sanitizer masking death. The doctors disagree though, they thought that three days was not quite enough time to recover from getting thrown through a wall and landing on an already set dining table, causing lacerations from glassware and fine china plates. The typical possibilities when getting into fights in the ~~house~~ mansion of a rich person. Hey, at least he had managed to roll to narrowly avoid the falling chandelier, even if it did mean that a heavy vase had been knocked off of the sideboard, conveniently falling on his head. Doctors are usually stronger than even a PI when he’s got a major concussion, several broken or fractured ribs, a broken ankle, and cuts crisscrossing his entire back and most of his stomach.

Two days later, a doctor stood outside arguing with a nurse, the words muffled, but clearly a disagreement until the nurse showed the doctor some form of paperwork, which caused the doctor’s shoulders to rise and fall quickly, indicating a large sigh, before handing the clipboard back to the nurse and sticking one hand in the pocket of his coat and opening the door. “Mister Steel, how are you feeling this morning?” The chipper attitude was even more fake than the three inch long nails Rita sometimes comes into work with when she wants a day off from typing anything.

“What were you arguing with the nurse about, doctor?”

His smile dropped and the nurse, who had followed him through the door shyly, took a step back, standing next to the door, ready to run at any point. Really comforting. “Despite my years of medical training resulting in medical expertise, your medical bills have all been paid and there has been.... substantial monetary encouragement for your release, and since the paperwork has already been signed, I have no option at this point but to release you.”

Juno was perplexed by what the doctor had just said.“Wait, what? I can tell you I don’t have more than a thousand creds to my name right now, who paid for this?”

“Nurse Jonas, what was the name of the person who paid? It should be at the bottom of that sheet.”

The nurse looked down at her clipboard, scanning for a moment. “Ajax Lark, doctor.”

“Thank you.” He turned to face back towards Juno. “I don’t know how he managed the total procedure costs and in addition to the bribe, but he did. He sent his secretary to collect you, someone named…. Rita?” He turned back toward the nurse, who nodded. “We were told you would know who she is, she absolutely refused to give us a last name.”

Juno sighed. “I do, yes.”

The doctor put back on his fake smile. “Wonderful. Well, Mister Steel, I hope you recover well, just remember that if you have any lasting issues, the hospital can have a physician prescribe PT or any additional pain killers, just go to the Non-Urgent Care wing and they’ll take care of you. Take care, and I hope I don’t have to see you again any time soon. Nurse Jonas will help you downstairs and outside.” He turned around and left without even another glance at the nurse, off to yell at someone else probably.

“Wow, what a dick. Why do you let him treat you like that?”

\----

He chatted with Nurse Jonas while she got him all ready to leave the hospital. She brought Juno outside in a wheelchair to the car that Rita was standing next to. Surrounded by people ogling at it. Because for whatever reason, Rita had driven the Ruby 7 to pick him up from the hospital. He closed his eyes and took a heavy sigh, which hurt more than he would’ve liked. He saw Rita looking around all the people, slightly panicky as he kept asking her questions about the car, but light up when she saw him. “MISTAH STEEL!” She ran towards him, as if to give him a hug, before making eye contact with Nurse Jonas, who simply shook her head no, which meant Rita instead simply grasped his shoulders as lightly as she could. “Oh Mistah Steel I was so worried about’cha and -”

“Rita. Concussion. Please stop screaming. I missed you too. Why do you have the Ruby 7. Who the hell paid for this. Tell me in the car, just get me into it.” Juno kept his eyes closed, clearly in pain, but in too much pain to even lift his hands to cover his ears. She and Nurse Jonas helped Juno into the passenger seat of the Ruby 7, which helped the mass of people to go away.

“Here,” Nurse Jonas put a prescription bag in Rita’s hands. “Don’t let him take more than two a day. There’s a number on there in case the prescription runs out, but also my number’s on there in case you have any questions. Take care of him, he’s really nice.” Rita stood there dumbfounded for a moment while she watched as Nurse Jonas winked and walked back towards the doors to the hospital. Once she was inside, Rita’s trance was finally broken and she went around to sit in the driver’s seat of the Ruby 7.

Juno had closed his eyes, trying to block out as much of the pain as he could, and was letting Rita ramble on about all the things that he’d missed while in the hospital, mostly updates on the plot points of the soaps she had been watching constantly without him lurking over her shoulder to tell her to get back to work. When she started to trail off, Juno realized that there was something wrong. It shouldn’t have taken them that long to get back to the office from the hospital, Juno had made the drive himself plenty of times, and even without watching the scenery as it flew past, he could tell Rita was putting the Ruby 7’s speed to use. Juno opened his eyes and turned his head only enough so that he could see Rita’s face so that she couldn’t lie to him. “Rita where are we going we’re obviously not going to the office or my apartment, what’s up?”

She fidgeted her fingers against the steering wheel for a moment. “Well…. I was told not to tell ya where we’re goin….”

“Rita you know I hate surprises.”

“Well, I am allowed to give ya one hint. It was just “bouquets”. That’s all I know, Mistah Steel, I neva even met this Ajax Lark fella. I mean I also know where we’re goin but I got promised some reeeeeeeeally nice shoes I’ve been lookin at if I don’t tell ya where I’m takin ya, so my lips are sealed.” She mimed zipping her mouth shut, and then two seconds late mimed unzipping them. “It’s a hotel and resort called Paradise Springs. We’re almost there.”

Juno immediately knew what was happening and was excited and scared. He knew who Ajax Lark really was, but he didn’t say anything to Rita. It had been a few months since he had received any form of contact from him, so while not unwelcome, unexpected.

Two minutes later, they were pulling into the drop off circle in front of the hotel and the one and only Peter Nureyev was there with a wheelchair waiting. “Oooooooohhhhhh, it’s that Dark Matters fella you went to the Kanagawa’s with!”

“He’s a big fan of his codenames, Rita. Make sure you just stick with his Ajax Lark one, or go with whatever he says.” When Peter opened Juno’s door, the smell of his cologne immediately wafted in, bringing a slight smile to Juno’s tired face. “Mr Lark, it’s been a while, hasn’t it.”

“It truly has. I see that all of the money transfers went through.” Peter smiled at Rita, who smiled back. Juno turned around to look at Rita, confused and perplexed.

“They did, but where did it all come from?”

“Let’s get Mr. Steel inside, I know it was a bit of a ways from the hospital, but this is truly one of the best spots to recover from serious physical trauma in my experience. Rita, would you mind giving me a hand?” They ignored Juno’s protests about how Peter wasn’t answering his question, why was he being so cryptic, where are they even going, what’s this drink you’re handing me, what do you mean you put two of the painkillers in there, until finally Juno fell asleep and they were able to finally able to put him to bed. They closed the door to let him get some peace and quiet, and sat in the living room of the suite that Peter had procured.

“Mista Lark?”

“Please, just call me Peter while it’s just us.”

“Well then, Mista Peter, I do have one question myself.”

“Well, there are no guarantees I’ll have an answer for you, but I’ll try my best.”

“Where did you get all that money from?”

Peter pulled out a shoe box from beneath the coffee table. “I’ll tell you, but only if you promise not to tell Juno.”

She sat up a little straighter, looking solely at the shoes. “Why does it matter so much that Mistah Steel doesn’t know?”

Peter sighed. “Well Rita, what Juno doesn’t know won’t kill him….”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the discord for talking about this like last week or something.
> 
> Yes, I named the nurse something similar to Nurse Johns because Eos 10 is back and emotions are real.
> 
> This has not been beta'd so please let me know if there's something wrong. (I'm also not like, in love with what I did with this, so I'm sorry if it's bad.)
> 
> Please kudos and comment if you enjoyed it, I just started my junior year of college so I'm dying on the inside right now but I'm also living in an apartment style dorm, so like, room to myself to stay up writing fanfic as much as I'd like. If you have anything you're like "hey, you should write this", feel free to message me on tumblr (mercutiglo) or discord (also mercutiglo)


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